Dear Tom & Katie:
You are beautiful, successful movie stars. NOW GO AWAY!!!! You are taking up valuable camera time that could be used by Jesse Jackson or Don King. Plus I heard that when two people REALLY REALLY REALLY Love each other (as you two obviously are) they sometimes commit suicide together! Now get to it! Prove your love to us!
Bitches.
Dear Tom & Katie,
ReplyDeleteAs a fellow Scientologist, I'd like to thank you for pioneering our cause and really bringing it to the world's attention. As we wait expectantly for the triumphant return of our lord and saviour, L. Ron Hubbard from the planet NimNok (click clock) VI, we are ECSTATIC to have people such as yourselves to guide us in our ultimate quest to create the shittiest, most overblown movies on Earth.
Yours in Hubbard,
Dwayne Bickett.
P.S.: Katie - Nice nipples in Batman!
You Scientologists have it all wrong! We must find the Round One.
ReplyDeleteYes, the Round One. A holy messenger trapped in a living globe. We must find him and release him so that he will carry us, the only true believer, to the Kingdom of Heaven, while those who reject him will mutate and burn eternally on Planet PX41, and Planet PX42 if they run out of room. Now, if there are no further questions, let's move on to the buffet.
You better shut up or you will accidentally start your own religion. And although the tax emempt status is nice, the crazies you gotta put up with are not.
ReplyDelete