It is hard to believe that the same network that gives us 'LOST' also gives us this drivel season after tedious season. Some rich guy can't get laid, so they make a show where they throw a horde of women (who are obviously deeply flawed or what are they doing on a reality show?) at him in order to get a match. So far exactly 1 couple (I think, I don't keep records) has gone all the way to marriage with one of these things. Meaning after they went through all this trouble to put relieve a bachelor of his bachelorhood he is still a bachelor. They should just call the show "Pointless."
If you are going to keep doing this, at least change it up a little bit. If they want to make the show interesting, I mean REALLY interesting, they should put me on there. Within minutes of meeting me I would make each and every one of them so uncomfortable as to commit suicide to get out of there. The rose ceremony would be a nightmare, where instead of someone getting eliminated by not getting a rose, I would just bring enough roses for everyone week after week. You want steamy sex? The broads would give it up to escape my 135 pound embrace, I guarantee it. I would only let them leave if they pleased me. I mean really which would you rather see:
A. 'I think I am falling in love with this billionaire guy. He is soooooo sweet and I've never felt this way before'
B. 'Okay. If you two gals kiss each other I'll let you go. And I mean a real kiss. An open mouth kiss. Lasting at least 1 minute. Annnnnnnnddddd GO! '
Good luck getting that a green light, Josh.
ReplyDeleteThough I've heard far worse ideas. I'd watch it.
Well, it doesn't even have to be me. They could use someone creepy liek Vincent Price, or someone who is a total jerk, like Andrew Dice Clay. I would prefer it wasn't me.
ReplyDeleteAnother idea I have is for a show called "Keeping up witht he Joneses" where they a get a bunch of celebrities with the last name Jones (Catherine Zeta, Roy Jr, Tom, Bridget, Alfred Moneyington etc.) and make them do something. I haven't thought of what yet.
I'm still waiting on a Baldwins vs. the Arquettes reality show in which they compete to the death and lone Hollywood family supremecy!
ReplyDeleteAlec will fight a long, protracted legal battle for visitation rights to his brothers in jail.
ReplyDeleteOpen Letter To Josh: Stop WATCHING the Bachelor.
ReplyDeleteI know you do.
Perv.
P.S. Call me after the next episode, we need to talk.