WE ARE GOING TO WRESTLEMANIA

What better way to spend your rent than by blowing a big chunk of it on Wrestlemania tickets? Although I got a deal on the tickets, they are still pretty pricey, and even now I am feeling a little buyers remorse. Hopefully, K-Dawg can beat that remorse out of me, though, as we are now on the ROAD TO WRESTLEMANIA. Which is really just 294 East to to 90/94 to Rosemont . Acolyte Hurley and Acolyte Jones, former Tag Team partners now turned into best friends will face-off to see who can create the biggest Wrestlemania Moment! Can we create a sign that will earn us a place in COLISEUM HOME VIDEO History? Will one of us jump from the Upper deck with a devasting elbow drop onto HHH? Can I conquer Trish Stratus and become the NEW WOMEN'S Champion? What will happen if Acolyte Hurley grabs the Money in the Bank Briefcase? All of these questions will be answered SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY at the Rosemont Horizon!!!!!

My Ode To Dan

...featuring one of my FAVORITE Dan stories.

NRSFW!

I stole your idea like Microsoft stole from Apple...

Sorry Force Spike but it's so fun to make monkeys talk.

An Ode to my friend, Kevin Hulkster

Monkey Message!!

A special monkey fan message awaits us all right through here!!

[Not entirely unsafe for work, but may get you weird looks... even more than usual, that is]

And I'll post over yours! FLAWLESS VICTORY!

Please fondle my buttocks.

I'll Post Over Your Post too!!!

Sorry, Kev. I had to do it. One thing you left out though was that the Family Guy episode was written by Cherry Chevapravatdumrong. Now that's a name!

Animation Trepidation

Tonight was the Simpsons episode with Ricky Gervais... if you missed it, but have seen the original British run of "The Office", then you really didn't miss it. They basically rehashed the David Brent character for the whole show, right down to giving him a guitar and having him play with his tie. Fortunately, it's a funny character, so it was watchable, but I was hoping for something more. Anyway, here are some Family Guy quotes:

"We want to have a baby, so we want some sperm and an applicator that looks like Jodi Foster's knuckles."

"I need to evict(?) a White Russian from my Kremlin"

"We already have Bobby, Marsha, Ricky, Urkle..."
"Those are kids on TV..."
"Blanka, Guile, Chun Li..."
"That's Street Fighter..."
"Red, Blue, Green..."
"Okay, those are colors."

Peter's whole "role-playing" monologue

"It's like trying to find diversity in the A&F catalog"

"You'd still do her?"
"Oh yeah. I would wreck that chick."

"I'm just gonna go over here while he fits you all for cups in that windowless shed. Bye."

"Fat sex is the hottest sex we've ever had!"


Has American Dad been cancelled? Or is FOX now afraid to cancel any MacFarlane show?

Ricky Gervais does The Simpsons

Well, I just finished watching the episode and I have to say I'm disappointed. The funniest bit in the whole episode was probably when Homer said he wouldn't vote for the gay adoption proposition because the polling place was up a hill and he never makes it.

Otherwise, it was just kinda blah. And considering The Simpsons just got renewed for 2 more years, I guess I just had my hopes up.

Get Your New Hillary in '08 T-shirt!

SoaP is blowing up!

One of my co-workers is also an avid follower of all things Snakes-on-a-Plane related, and today I got word of this story on CNN.com, which breaks the news that the unforseen and ever-growing cult popularity of the film on the Internet has - and I'm not making this up, as you'll see - caused New Line to actually shoot additional scenes and recut the film based on the demands of the fan "community". What started as a joke of a movie is, well, pretty much still a joke, but a vocal legion of moviegoers has made a studio pay attention and run with the joke for all its worth. This is awesome! The best part - they added a line for SLJ!! Try and guess what it is!

WrestleVania in Chicago!!!

There are a whole lot of Wrestlemania related events going on in town soon. See what they are here:

http://www.411mania.com/wrestling/news/38988/More-WWE-News:-Updated-Chicago-Area-Mania-Weekend-Events-List.htm

Go Bradley!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

I know that I never went to ANY of their games when I was an undergrad, but WOOOOOOOOOO! I've got MARCH MADNESS!!!!!! YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

August is too far away

First sneak peek at Snakes on a Plane!!!

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Anyone care to chat?

My doppelganger ...

What makes this so freaking weird is the whole San Diego-Peoria connection. It's practically creepy!!!

Check out what I'm talking about here.

It's 2 am on a school night and time for another top 10...

Top Ten Reasons why I love Ken Lombard:

1) His last name is associated with people who attacked northern Italy a long time ago including the vandals, turks and visigoths among others.
2) He makes me want to pee
3) He's a wannabe skater dude. Or maybe he really does skate. Is that a half pipe in your backyard ken?
4) When he was bigger and did this one dance it kinda reminded me of a bear jumping around
5) He has a great smile
6) He enjoys the deepdish
7) He enjoys the deepthroat oh my golla
8) He rides buses and hears things no one else can hear. To quote ghostbusters, "Listen...do you smell something?"
9) I think I still owe him money for getting me taco bell with a massive overhead rate since it was being supplied by Bradley internally which was run by none other than it's good for my thumb.
10) He is my godfather and when I reminisce about him it brings a tear of joy to my eye and laughter to my heart. And my sperm count goes up.

Cheers mate.

How To Play:

The Russian Coaster Game

aka "The Stupidest Game In The World"


Background: The Russian Coaster game was created in March 2005 at a backyard party during Chicago's South Side Irish Parade. The game was born from boredom, drunkenness, and stupidity - three KEY ingredients you need to play the game

Materials Needed: Five (5) to Eight (8) beer coasters - any brand(but German is preferred), 4 - 100 players.

How To Play: Play begins with a "showdown". A extra person is needed to perform a countdown. This person counts down from 3 to 1 and then yells 'SLAP'. The first person to slap the table or bar starts the game as the dealer.
The dealer lays out all of the coasters in front of the other players and immediately thinks of one of the coasters. The players then put their finger on the coaster that they *think* the dealer is thinking about. Once all players are touching a coaster, the dealer then proceeds to SLAP each incorrect player in the FACE! However, if someone guesses correctly, that person is allowed to SLAP the dealer, and then becomes the dealer for the next round.
In the event that more than one person guesses the correct coaster, a series of SLAP-OFFS are run between the individuals to determine who will become dealer. Each player slaps each other in sequence until one player concedes, and the game continues.

How To Win: In the Russian Coaster Game, there are no winners, only losers.

Is the world going deaf?

I'm sitting on the bus right now, and even though I am a good 10 feet away from this middle aged cracker with headphones, I can clearly hear that he is rocking out to Beyonce. I've noticed that this happens a lot. I always thought that headphones do a decent job of hiding the sound from others - so either headphones suck these days, or people are going deaf.

2007 Academy Awards

Best Motion Picture of the Year

Snakes on a Plane (2006)

Best Performance by an Actor in a Leading Role

Samuel L. Jackson for Snakes on a Plane (2006)

Best Performance by an Actress in a Leading Role

Charlize Theron for Presenting the 2007 Academy Award for Best Picture to Snakes on a Plane (2006)

Best Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role

Ian Forbes for writing The Sobering Conclusion (2005)

Best Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role

Emma Watson for getting drunk (2006)

Best Achievement in Visual Effects

Mummy Josh in Underground G.I. Joe Fort (2006)

Best Foreign Language Film

Les Serpents Sur un Avion (2006)

Best Short Film, Live Action

Snakes on a Plane [edited version] (2006)

Best PUNCH TO THE FACE

Samuel L. Jackson for Snakes on a Plane (2006)

Best PUNCH TO A SNAKE

Jean-Claude Van Damme for Hard Target (1993)

Best EVERYTHING ELSE (NEW CATEGORY)

Snakes on a Plane (2006)

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