Blogger Profiles: Upgrayedd

Real Name: Definitely Dan

Age: of Aquarius

Sex: In a Burger King bathroom

Location: Around the way

Likes: Money, women, cars, power, money

Dislikes: Kittens, Things that make you say 'hmmmm'

Favorite Sports Team: Milwaukee Beers

Favorite "Forbes": Tickle Me Forbes.

Favorite Posse Moments: Stopping the Internet with a piece of paper, Voltron commentary, Mattress Wars

Worst College Moments: The times I had to pause my video game and/or put down a beer and go to class

Goals in Life: To bring sexy back

Movie that defines my life: Rad

Twix or Kit Kat?: Skat Kat

Duane Bickett / Marshall from How I Met Your Mother

Separated at birth???

edit by Full Force - I think you need to add some Bruce Campbell into the mix. See below. Possible new names for this guy: Bruce Bickett, MarshCampball, Duane Ash (Duash?)

KEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!

THIRTY-THREE YEARS OF NIZUTS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Blogger Profile: General Anacock

Real Name: NOT Kevin

Age: Size + 2

Sex: Yes please.

Location: on the off ramp, waiting to clean off your windshield with my urine.

Likes: to move it move it

Dislikes: Kevin Hurley, Josh Jones, Ian Forbes, Dan Bowers, Duane Bickett

Favorite Sports Team: The Chicago one that doesn't suck.

Favorite "Forbes": Sleepy Grampa Forbes in his recliner.

Favorite Posse Moments: Writing some of the greatest songs never published, our absurd ritual send off for Ethan, Creating this blog.

Worst College Moments: they all involved drinking heavily and regretting it, but recently I recalled 'Long Island Iced Tea' night. Ugh.

Goals in Life: to be the best....around......nothin's ever gonna get me down!

Movie that defines my life: The Big Lebowski

Twix or Kit Kat?: Fuck You. Reeses FTW.

Blogger Profiles: Full Force

Real Name: different than Ken's

Age: younger than Ken

Sex:

Location: All up in yo' shit.

Likes: rejecting the null hypothesis, parties, not playing the horn

Dislikes: a balanced breakfast, huge pectoral muscles, playing the horn

Favorite Sports Team: Tactical Chunder

Favorite "Forbes": Ian Velociraptor Forbes

Favorite Posse Moments: "Mortal Kombatting" the wellness floor, the Purdue 3 road trip & video, calling into WRBU

Worst College Moments: the aftermath of the "Hero of the Day" party, "Hell at the Bell" never happening

Goals in Life: to be nobody's lunch!

Movie that defines my life: My Algonquin

Twix or Kit Kat?: Close, but Kit Kat.

It took 9 months, but it finally went viral...

My weatherman is the shizz. If you remember I posted about this guy 9 months ago. Go ahead...go back in time and check it out.

And now...Direct from the Yahoo! Homepage...

My Superbowl Pick

This year's Super Bowl seems to be a contest between one's head and one's heart. Your brain knows that Peyton Manning is the second coming of Joe Montana, and possibly the greatest QB to ever put on whatever pants QB's wear. But your heart knows that the Saints are hungry for a Superbowl win to unite their previously submerged city, and it yearns to see a happy ending to an uplifting story of redemption. The Colts are boring, cold, and clinical. The Saints are alive, mixing up their offensive gameplan.

Well, the Colts don't fucking care. The fact is, as nice as you are, you are standing between a Manning and a trophy, and you goin to get messed up. Plus, I am from Indy. REPRESENT!

Colts 59 (They score 7 touchdowns and successfully attempt the 2 point conversion on all of them plus one FG for old man Stover).

Saints 9 (3 FG's)

NOW who do I draft at QB next year??

Warner retires after 12-year NFL career

Did we peak too early?

So, this band called .357 Lover made a song about Event Horizon ... which made me wonder if we went to college 10 years later, would "Tasty Wheat" have made it to YouTube? ... which reminded me that I was playing Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 and ran across a guy whose PSN gamer tag was Whiskey Dick, though he thought I was making fun of him every time I said "Ohhh, Whiskey Dick!", which was a lot of times.

Next up on IMPACT: Scott Hall eats himself!!!

Anyone else see this lame attempt by TNA to bring up the ratings? They're basically showcasing talent that is 25 years past their prime (Nash, Hall, Hogan, Flair - even Foley), meanwhile saying 'oh yeah, and here are our regular wrestlers, they're here too. They even ditched the 6 sided ring to accommodate Hogan. Granted, WWE is no longer up to par in terms of entertainment value, but these wrestlers that TNA is bringing in are really, really, really old this time. It's not just Ric Flair circa 2000 old, or Hogan circa post-80's old. But anyways, I'm just hoping that Fat Razor Ramon makes it into the next TNA game. If not, we can build him. We have the hilarity.

Metallica rolling over in their pre-bought coffins

So, this group decided to cover "Battery" ... well ... yeah ... just click here ... or don't.

PS3 Trophies

Trophies - the PlayStation Network's achievement system for PS3 games - have become quite popular with PS3 owners. What are some of the most sought-after Trophies?

"2 Cold"
Game: Assassin's Creed 2
Grade: Bronze
Requirements: Stab a dude in the FACE!

"The Dork Knight"
Game: Batman: Arkham Asylum
Grade: Bronze
Requirements: Utter the phrase "I'm Batman!" to yourself 3 times during Story Mode.

"lolz n00b"
Game: Modern Warfare 2
Grade: Bronze
Requirements: Insult another player online using a non-sensical combination of any 5 ethnic slurs and vulgar sexual phrases.

"Quiet Restraint"
Game: God of War III
Grade: Silver
Requirements: Do not turn on your console for 7 years after completing Act I.

"Heavy Lumber"
Game: MLB '10
Grade: Gold
Requirements: You hit a home run using your character's dick.

"End It!"
Game: Guitar Hero: Upstream Premium Division
Grade: Platinum
Requirements: Earn all trophies for perfectly playing UPD's unbelievable catalog of hits.

This was a bad idea

HAS ETHAN CONANT BEEN FOUND?!?!

It is yet to be confirmed, but stay tuned!

I also had sex with Tiger Woods.

That is all.

17 days

Fun with Google, Part 2

You remember that classic bit from the Purdue 5 video where Ken proclaims, "This is how we fuck!"...right? Of course you do. Well, that popped into my head for no reason (not that it needs a reason), so I decided to type "how to f" in the Google search bar to see what predictive text choices would pop up.

This is what it gave me. These aren't in alphabetical order, so I have to assume they're ranked by popularity.

OK, I give up

Why is he on a riding mower wearing goggles, gloves and a snow hat in the middle of what appears to be summer!?!?

This is for Kevin

As a member of the KH fan club, sometimes I have to leave links for him to enjoy. SO if you aren't Kevin, this probably won't be very interesting. In fact, it will be stupid.

But if you are Kevin, then I advise you to pour yourself a tall glass of Arizona Iced Tea, grab some Chex Mix, and click on the link above. You are about to be entertained.

Well, what do you know...

...Alice in Chains made a new album. And it's pretty good. Check it out.