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Wednesday, July 20, 2005

I, STARSCREAM, AM YOUR NEW LEADER

Megatron has fallen! Now, Decepticons, follow me and I will lead us to victory! Here are my plans for destroying the Autobots, maximizing energon production, and conquering Earth & Cybertron.

1. You, Ramjet...take some goddamn shooting lessons!

2. Soundwave, noone is going to believe you are a friggin tape deck. It's 2005, try transforming into an iPod or something.

3. We need some new things for Decepticons to transform into. Like a stapler. Or a floodlight. Maybe a refrigerator with the ice cube tray right in the door . That would be awesome.

4. The Autobots will surrender and return peaceably to cybertron to serve their Decepticon masters, or I will release the "Optimus Prime Sex Tape". You'll never look at Bumblebee the same.

5. 'Enemy swap' with Cobra Commander.

1 comment:

  1. Seriously, didn't any of the transformers ever hear of an electromagnetic pulse?

    I mean, that's the endgame.

    Done and done.

    But Starscream's ideas probably would work too.

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