I mean sure, there was the flood in New Orleans, the fires in California, the Tsunami in some Asian country I could care less about (but Angelina Jolie does to keep her endless supply line of children in tact), but this Apocalypse really hasn't been that impressive.
Sure there's the housing market collapse, the war in the Middle East, the writer's strike, the choice of either Obama, Clinton, or McCain as President, the failure of Steven Colbert to gain a nomination - but really, is this all Mother Nature's got?!?
I guess we all just got spoiled by those scary stories in the Bible with first born dying and rivers flowing with blood - plagues, disease. Instead we get some killer bees that got lost somewhere on the way to North America, some cicadas that forget to actually come up (most likely because their larvae were destroyed building another Walgreens), and some 98 year old man winning an Oscar and ranting on for 15 minutes about how he had breakfast at Denny's and his toast was too soft and the waitress could have been nicer and shown respect for a veteran of foreign wars.
Seriously, if this Apocalypse is going to be any good at all, we need some more ACTION, suspense, and blood! How bout some real Mad Max shit!! How about some evil corporation (I'm looking at you Apple!) building a highly advanced computer system that becomes self aware and starts implanting iPods onto every living being, taking over their minds and distracting them from..........
......aw shit....
Well, I guess now we are plagued with the choice of Ralph Nader for President.
ReplyDelete"This is how the world ends... not with a bang, but a whimper."
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